Back to my old opinionated self

An Open Letter to Alberto Gonzales

Dear Mister Gonzales,
I listened to NPR this morning and heard some senators wondering what in the hell happened when you started firing a whole bunch of US attorneys. Mister Gonzales, permit me to say that listening to you backpeddle and stammer and ramble on and on when the question you were asked was a simple yes or no question made me realize what a douchebag you really are.
Mister Gonzales, nobody believes you when you fumble and whine about how you have "misspoken" or how you "cannot recall." When you were in school, did you learn about this thing called checks and balances? Did you learn even CYA, for crying out loud? You set a pussy example of someone being questioned about his ethics. You sound like a first class whiner with a briefcase full of lame, wet, boring excuses. There is no way you have been doing the job you were hired to do if you can't even remember a meeting that is ON YOUR CALENDAR which took place less than 6 months ago, Mister Gonzales.
I need an attorney general who has some balls. Like Carol Lam. Or my mom. Please tender your resignation, tuck your lying, weeny tail between your legs, and stop wasting our time.
Love,
Zetta